Waiting for Mommy

Any time I spend around other “average” children the age of my littles, I find myself jealous. Mothers especially love to a compare milestones, tell you how smart there baby is, and judge when yours doesn’t stack up. I find myself angry. Angry that their child, whom presumably has been offered all of the opportunities in life, is being compared to my littles who had all the odds against them from conception. I have “average” children, I know what it’s like.

Tiny Tru Dylan

Tennyson was my first real visit into the world of a delayed child. She didn’t talk for a very long time, and it was frustrating. You look at this little person and, just the same as every mother wants, you want them to say “Mommy”. Thankfully, Tenny happily learned to sign and used that as her way to communicate until she began talking. Tru is a whole new beast. The boy rejects signing, instead choosing to scream, constantly. At times I question is it being the youngest of 5 that causes this? Is it having 4 older siblings who will respond because, they too, do not want to hear the screams? Is it because, to them, a scream means something and they will talk for him? Or is it the massive amounts of drugs he was exposed to in utero? Or does it even matter? Fact is, my littlest little can’t tell me what he wants, and that breaks my heart. Less importantly, it means my littlest little does not call me Mommy.

With all the screaming he does he is lucky he is so darn cute!

So I sit and wait. I wait for that special moment when he looks into my eyes with his big
sweet adorable blue eyes and says “Mommy”. I wait for that moment like it will mean anything different for our relationship. Logically, I know he knows who I am. He has been mine since he was 5 days old. It’s the heart that hurts when the words are lacking. The other day I cuddled and tickled him in bed, just loving on my little having some special one on one time. I looked in his face, tickled his cheeks, and I asked him to say Mommy. Having spent nearly his entire life in speech therapy, he is very good at watching mouths and attempting to imitate. After a few encouragements from me, my little buddy looked and me and said “Mommy”! Did I cry? Absolutely! That magical moment I feel jealous of other mothers for happened. Since then he has only said it one more time, but twice is enough for now. I heard it, with my own two ears. I’m a pretty happy Momma.

Tru Love

Spending time with other mothers will still be hard. I heard that magic word, but, although it fills my heart, he is still behind the curve. I know he is not going to stack up for a while. I know for him everything will take a lot more work. Good for you your child knew his abc’s at 14 months and is reading at 16 months. I’m so happy for your little one that learned to ride a bike at 2 and was doing algebra by 2 ½. My little buddy is 22 months and he just said “Mommy”.